We had a field trip to Fort Qu’Appelle and Lebret. I was both excited and nervous for this field trip because I knew it was going to bring a wealth of knowledge and wisdom. But I also knew it was going to be very raw. We were going to be in the exact same area as where Treaty 4 was signed. We were also going to be in the exact same area as where one of the residential schools was. The fact that there was a gym still standing, was surreal to me. When we had the opportunity to spread tobacco on the land, I was scared at first. I was scared because I thought it was contradicting to my beliefs. But, the best thing I did was ask what it actually means. As I stated in a previous post, it is easy to just take what many people say as truth, when many people also lack accurate knowledge or understanding about the practices. Because I was able to seek the truth, I was able to contribute to scattering tobacco on the sacred land. But, I also took it upon myself to pray as I walked around. I did this in my head. My heart was heavy, knowing what had happened, and what is still happening on this land.